Sitting in the pantomime after talking to a man who was talking to my mum and awkwardly asked 'so are you at uni? College? Sixth form?'
'No unfortunately in February Lizzie suffered a stroke so it's all on hold for now...'
All I could do was smile And act as if I didn't want to just cry.
The panto started and as tradition everyone claps along with the cast
'Come on boys and girls clap!!'
I sat on the balcony looking around and down just full of a room where everyone was doing something I longed for. Clapping
Yeah not everyone's dream wish but it's something you'd want if you couldn't do it..
I just slapped my knee and smiled but inside was crying desperately
Today something I did which to me was such a big thing was go into town with Dan wearing my splint under tights
'Baby can you see it? Does it look bad?'
'No you can't honestly you look gorgeous'
People looked at my leg in shock Infact at the panto a little girl stared at it while I walk out of the lift and she looked terrified I watch people run down flights of stairs and miss it so much. So much that the other day I said to dan 'can you teach me to walk one foot after another downstairs because my leg won't bend fast enough'
'Babe it'll come in time you'll be fine I'm here'
Again the awkward smile appeared..
I'm terrified of the future but happy to say I am finally spending new year with someone who cares about me and won't get arrested because last year was awful basically a start to the worst year.
I feel so comfortable next to dan that my arm stayed straight today when I walked and it's never done that.
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