Pilgrims Hospice...

For those who aren't aware I'm currently helping out at Pilgrims Hospice;
reception, water duties, tea & coffee duties and believe it or not (I've emptied an ash tray for an older lady)...

This blog is separated into different sections, all of which explain (hopefully in detail) my days at the Hospice and what it's like to work with a disability, because
YES you can work with a disability!!
Brain injury, epilepsy, blood conditions or just like a lady I'm shadowing at the moment (false legs)

''Oh did I hurt you?''
I work alongside some lovely ladies (all older of course) whom mainly moan about the fact they've retired and are turning 67, (can't compete)
You have to explain the fact that there are some things you aren't able to do, I mean it would be hard with one arm/hand (lets be honest)
My seizures are so random, I mean my left arm swings out and hits people.. without warning, I just kind of grab it & apologise as it's embarrassing. This lady I was shadowing was almost a 'victim' of the arm swing, I mean after explaining I can't physically move it, it's quite a shock when it swings out and hit you (I've had people move away from me because of it)..
 I'm happy cause it's moving!!..
 When the arm swung out she thought she'd hurt me, just like Liam said
''I was scared to touch you the first time I met you as I didn't want to hurt you'' (it's fine, I can't feel it)

Connections
I have friends at university but to get out of the house and socialise is so nice! I feel 'normal' You get that BUZZ to just get up and go in.. which I used to get at work but, that soon changed..


Hugs & sympathy 
''ooo I'll see you next week i'll come say hi!!''
They are all so lovely but this one woman actually hugged me (no one ever does) therefor I kind of stood there and froze as I'm not used to it (brain overload - brain injury kicking in)..
When it's my mum or Liam I'll swing my left arm round them and grip them really tight, this was a complete stranger...
Feels good to be loved by someone else.


The Till 
Okay so I failed maths - U.. because I bunked all the time and literally never grasped it, I sit right by the till at the Hospice (people buy t-shirts, wrist bands and so on..) I was asked to count the money..
*yep, great.. kinda need to explain I'm really bad at maths*...
they just giggled, which was nice because in Fenwicks, Monsoon & Next you had to have like 'extra training' JUST to work the till's..
*in other words, you were given a handbook that I basically threw away & never read* :)


''You refill their water & give them a fresh beaker''
I never knew I'd be doing this sort of thing and it's so fun, I'm on my feet 24/7 and it's gaining my confidence with my disability, just like meeting new people and being able to start conversations..
We go round with a really dodgy trolley (thats broken) and refill the patients (water jugs, beakers and replace cups and glasses)..The things people expect nurses to do in hospitals.
Were NOT allowed to go into rooms that are 'engaged' or anywhere with curtains closed, as it's obviously private & they are busy.


''Hello, what sticker would you like?'' 
I've always been a bit strange and OCD, they have; red, blue, yellow and green stickers on the desk, visitors have to wear one when they sign in.. I've been asked what colour people want,  as I thought it was polite (apparently it's annoying)..
We have the duty of making sure people have signed in and the lady I shadow actually shows them where to go (she's well cute) I call her the hugging lady..
They had new stickers today :( not coloured ones BUT you have to write the date on them..

ROSE COTTAGE  
For those who watched CBB this year will know that the bedroom was called 'rose cottage' I mean, obviously its very different to CBB...
A place I'll probably never visit but a place I know people go to mourn and grieve over a 'lost one'.. were NOT allowed to say 'dead body, passed away' or anything like that..

Today (Tuesday 5th September 2017) I witnessed the first rose cottage 'visit'
Us at reception get a list of patients and it lists 'deaths' impatiens' and so on, at the bottom of the sheet but you never realise how much you genuinely have to do,
The doors shut, everyone goes silent and you just see people look down as the beds wheeled round (nurses) I mean, when doing the morning water, tea and coffee round you kind of know who's very ill and some people aren't aware of the surroundings.



''Thank you so much and goodbye''
A man who was visiting a relative (must of only been in there 5 minutes) came straight back out again, as the person they visited had been wheeled to rose cottage. Us at reception aren't allowed to say 'sorry for your loss' or anything like that, as it's seen as rude..
You just kind of react to the slight smile the visitors giving, hiding away their tears and grief..
ready to release it all as they leave. ( I presume).


''You learn to adapt!''
When I meet friends with babies they always kind of avoid handing me their child because of my arm, Today I met a lady who has false legs and no fingers and two children, we compared how we do certain things,
''Oh my god, do you do your bra up before you put it on?!''
''I usually go one step at a time downstairs''..


My final point this this post is that, no matter what, you can always achieve anything and you should never give up. Just try and try again.

Keep smiling & keep your head held high.
I've learnt that people who judge you wouldn't cope (thats too you, my neuropsychologist whom I will always sl*g off)

:)