Side Room is Ready!

From the ward to my own room, mum thought it would be better for me to be in my own room, as other visitors were openly talking about how dangerous strokes were, this had started to scare me.  I was wheeled into the side room, it was silent but nice to be able to have all my cards up and make it look like my own room.

Baby Koala

‘Relax your fingers Liz’,  ’I can’t!’. ‘you are like a baby Koala clawing’.  This made me smile, Luke sat there and stroked my hand, and tried to straighten my fingers.  They would just claw, it was uncomfortable and uncontrollable.  I thought would always be like this?  Or would I recover. Then started the process of hand massage, everyday my step dad would come in and massage my hand with creams, this is so that the sensation comes back, but its also nice having physical contact, its also important not to neglect the affected limb.  My Nan arranged for me to have a manicure, this was also important as I wanted to feel that it was still part of me.  

I can move my leg!!

Week three, physio had just finished, my Dad sat on the chair beside my bed.  I kept thinking ‘you can do it, use your strength’, and I lifted it from the hip, it was amazing I looked at my Dad and smiled.  It now seemed like there was light at the end of the tunnel, I could start to walk, I couldn't wait to show the physio’s.

Nose over Toes

Something I never thought I’d have to re-learn was how to stand up.  My physio sat next to me on the plinth and another sat in front of me, ‘right Lizzie, you need to put your nose over your toes and tuck your bum in!’.  I pushed up from the plinth and was standing, ’I did it’!  But not for long, I had to sit down as I got light headed and felt faint.  They said I had been lying down for so long I wasn’t used to standing, my blood pressure was affected.  This I would learn would be a regular occurrence until I got used to physio.  The other thing about these early sessions was that they were so overwhelming I would cry, especially if someone was watching.  I now had goals, one of which was to try and sit out of the bed everyday.

Goodbyes

The hardest thing is saying goodbye to people.  Especially in the side room, as I felt all alone.  When I was at home I would see Luke nearly everyday, and I would get to choose when I left him.  In hospital it was so restricting, he would come after work whenever he could, but we would only spend two hours together, I missed us being how we wanted.  My Mum would come to see me everyday, and when she left I would cry, I wished she could stay with me.