Wednesday 22 February 2017

Nothing is actually wrong..

I used to blame my stroke for ruining my life and making me so distant from this weird version of 'normal'.. just like everyone else, being able to wear heels again, able to run, use both arms and just be happy again..

When given 'goals' in hospital all I ever wanted was;
To return to uni
To learn to walk
To be able to hug again.

Everyday I hug Liam, both arms wrap around, goal complete
I'm at uni nearly completing year two
I know when to stop and not over do myself
I'm walking distances that seemed impossible three years ago

Goals are complete..
Obviously there will be more and are more but I've learnt not to put a challenge on my recovery
I'm aware it slows down, although I do still sit there trying to open my hand, hoping it'll just work.
I used and still do have people who knew me before my stroke pretend their my 'best friend' telling me that 'they got upset when they heard about it'
Funnily enough when they'd have a drink in a club..

The majority of those use the famous saying
"I still think you'll wake up one day and be back to normal"
Hahahaha give me a break..

At uni I've made the truest friends who accept me for who I am, I'm able to cut those who just want some fake relationship out of my life

I go to the gym three times a week..
my fatigue is so good that sometimes Liam needs to force me to nap because I'm genuinely not tired,
9-5 days and coping
*woo go me*

I can do this and I'll recover at my own speed and in my own time.

I live with 5 illnesses everyday of my life but I'm managing it, I'm stronger than ever and happier than I ever thought I'd be.

Here's to the rest of my life and my recovery

:)

Thursday 9 February 2017

Three year mark

normally I'm constantly blabbing on about how scared I am the night before my stroke, it's been three years and I completely forgot..
I remember when my life revolved around my stroke, my advice to people who have had one Is to focus on recovering not making your brain become hurt or upset..

I've learnt so much this past year, not just that you actually have to pay for water
But moving out and starting a refreshing milestone, I still stress a lot but I am at university and they even found out the cause of my stroke, after 2 years?!?!

I don't take things for granted anymore, I go to the gym three times a week and I've managed to loose over 2 stone, but I still moan that I'm fat, typical girl talk..

I've been on holiday with Liam and booked another one for this year, and actually walked on sand!
My next goals aren't as extreme as last year,

Gain even more confidence and just carry on recovering to my best ability,

This year I've learnt my limits and reached goals that I'd set daily, even as small as carrying my MacBook to uni..
but after a stroke small goals help you achieve a lot more than you'd think.
Yes I still struggle, I do still have a brain injury and I still get stares but I've learnt to just walk holding my head up and smile.
I even managed to buy some shoes that are in fashion! They fit with my afo that I still wear because my ankle is still weak and drop footed, I can't do some things because of my epilepsy but I'm used to it now. I'm a student ambassador as well as a course representative!
My fatigue is basically gone, Liam says he's worse than me, I never need a nap and I'm always awake.
I looked through a 'stroke diary' I decided to create just after my stroke, I still get upset reading it.

But here's to another year of positivity and happiness