Thursday 21 May 2015

I respect you don't

I don't expect you to understand how hard it is or how impossible little things can be, 
I don't even want you to understand because it's not something I'd wish apon anyone.. 

I hate the thought of anyone reaching an old enough age to have a stroke, because it would hurt to much to know you might go through this pain; not realising, loosing confidence, struggling to even walk, feeling weak constantly and loosing everything you thought was going to stay with you forever. I'd hate to think of you going through the stage of wanting to just give up and end your life, even feeling like your life was never worth living.. 

You know when you sit there and think 
'Yeah this is my plans my goals and it will be my future and everything. 
Then you get it taken away literally in the space of evening to morning. 

You miss the days you could just wake up smiling and remember what you have planned for your future planned day to keep you moving to your goals.. 

You miss the days of just sitting in your room laying down staring at the ceiling thinking;
'Shit I've actually got a job and earn my own money, I'm going to do this forever  and then the next time/day you work being there thinking 'I fucking hate this job, can't wait to go home' .. 
You then sit there so happy the days over.


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