Thursday 7 September 2017

"But I can speak?"










...I remember being in hospital (the stroke ward) where you get the whole; 'once over'..
*yep okay we have a patient here, nil by mouth.. speech and language, occupational therapy, physiotherapist*.. and then
You get my most favourite person; healthcare assistant
'Here to suit your dietary needs and give you a healthy eating plan!' ..
Hmm okay, I've definitely never stuck to a 'healthy eating plan'

This blog post seems off topic(for now)
BUT..
And I will bore you, today (September 7th 2017) I started Speech and Language Therapy again..

My speech and language therapist, did tell me I could 'contact her whenever I need' and I guess you NEED to take advantage of the NHS :)

She's lovely! I actually think I get on 'too well' with all these 'healthcare professionals', one even told me their hairdresser was blatantly talking about me...
"You literally can't even tell she's had a stroke!"
...To the point where she had to tell the lady to stop talking, because I'm her patient..



 I waited in the waiting room (For a ridiculous amount of time) and then wandered through these double doors labelled 'SPEECH AND LANGUAGE THERAPY' the bold white typography over the top of a tight blue (standard NHS) plaque, JUST so everyone can watch where you're walking too (as if the elders don't stare enough) ..

The Room:

You sit in a small room surrounded by leaflets and flyers all promoting their services, which might I add are really good!

Then comes a huge A4 folder, BANG slammed on the small IKEA wood affect table, this contains sheets and books of 'quizzes' to test your brain and 'thinking time' ..
it's a normal procedure after a stroke just like the eye tests where they ask you numerous questions about "now, what number is this.."
"And can you point out all of the trees"

In fact; let's compare it to when you want to buy something online and you have to Answer the famous;
"Are you a robot?" Question..

It's exactly like that, but obviously with a brain injury you have to think a bit harder and in depth, because yes I do get confused still..

Brain injury;
I rush every scenario in my head "should I go and tell them I'm early?!" "Do I look stupid waiting here?" "Is the baby crawling towards my bag seriously gonna rummage through and possibly touch something it shouldn't, that'd be my fault.."
I don't think smiling at it's helping the situation....

The catch up phase;

It's been a while since I saw my 'therapist' so we had to have a 'catch up' I used to always drink her jug of water, every time I went.. (it helps your brain work) but also annoys my therapist because she's constantly up and down refilling the jug...

Learning;
So far I'm coping with the 'faults from my stroke' so I've started actually calling things by name instead of randomly adding in words.
I talk slower (still too much) but slower..
I'm more confident, in myself and the way I present myself, according to her "I don't seem as self-conscious as when she first met me"
I also am going into my final year of university!! (If I hadn't already said) therefor my writing skills are improving and I'm actually passing things.

Brain injury;
After a stroke you're always going to have one (don't beat yourself up about it, embrace it) no matter how stupid you look wandering in a circle talking to yourself, it's just a task of 'rewiring' and re connecting' my little disconnected strands inside my skull, 'elasticity' ..
My therapist explained that the 'people I meet on these Facebook forums mainly; epilepsy and stroke will ALL have a brain injury,

Example:
I recently got called a 'victim' because I shared this blog on a 'stroke survivors page'
don't ever call me a victim again.

*I shared my 'story' in your group because you asked me too...*


I have now left EVERY 'stroke forum' and refuse to join any more, because I have only been criticised; by the name of this blog, my 'story' and I don't ever want to be called a victim again.

My speech and Language Therapist explained "You need to stop assuming you're the one in the wrong because you're not,  just leave the groups.. some people are still really angry about the fact they've suffered a stroke"





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