Standing on my own two feet..

and an AFO (the famous plastic splint that you can all now see)..

My carpet isn't the cleanest but then neither is my splint.

''I've asked for a chair and table''

Today me and Lydia (works for Pilgrims Hospice Canterbury) visited ASDA in Canterbury to collect money for Pilgrims Hospice, I had been 'told' how popular the charity is and how generous people can be when donating, but I guess you just assume people don't bother *mainly because I just walk past charity tins and collectors*..
Lydia had asked for a table and chair "so if my leg hurt or I became too tired to stand I could sit down"

My goal
I made it my goal and aim to avoid this chair, I mean I sat on it once because I needed to sort my hair out and put the tin down BUT stood up straight away after feeling lazy. I remember being in a wheelchair just wishing I could stand and waiting for the day I could just jump up and wander off..

Lets play a game 
*now Lizzie, you need to stand up tall and smile.. don't be rude!* I said this to myself because I thought about how I wanted to 'stand out' as if I already didn't next to a huge 'Pilgrims Hospices' banner, holding a tin and looking exhausted (stupid fatigue).. I smiled because I like to make the most of having a 'straight smile' no droop included :)

'Take my strong hand' 

Never seen the film, but I know this quote is 100% from a film. I managed to hold the bucket with both hands, sometimes even my left (had to open it myself and grip it onto the handle as it's still unable to open). 

You can Stare 

But this time I really don't care. People stared *when my arm was 'loose' and hanging, because it does the gripping motion and raises up, as if I'm going to swing for someone.. I'm not. 

this is why I usually hold it, because it gets caught on people, things and looks 'odd' and I've been told that it looks stupid (won't say by who but you're a twat). 

Shaky Leg  (Clonus) 

A 'normal' thing for stroke survivors, Just like the 'leg swing' and lack of confidence. My knee still needs 'repositioning' when it gets 'tired' This is when the muscles are going 'crazy!' Like shaking uncontrollably, I've explained before I look insane, especially when standing up from a chair because it looks as if my knee is trying to run away.. BUT it helps me realise when I'm tired or 'getting tired'..

still stayed standing though :).

Confidence 

Believe it or not, standing wearing a blue t-shit with 'Pilgrims Hospice' holding a bucket collecting money, is such a confidence boost.. After my stroke because I'm able to 'start conversations' and meet new people. 'you gain the confidence to be independent and 'embrace' your disability. Like I ALWAYS  explain; confidence and independence are the main parts of recovering from a stroke..  whats a life without the confidence to be independent? 

 Fatigue Time 

I'm soooooo tired! that I was  actually excited to come home and drink a 'cuppa' *posssibly thanks to my new mug?* or maybe I'm getting old (birthday in a month).. 

As I walked home my leg started the 'swing' I notice this when I'm tired because it upsets me - reminding me of when my 'gateway' was REALLY bad.. 

(not gonna lie, I walk really well now) 

I'll add a comparison video soon *when I can be bothered* 

:) 

Lets give in to my fatigue and nap! *you know you want too Lizzie* 

How cool is my new mug though?..